For those of you, who are not attached to boring monogamous relationships and feel ready for exploration of new horizons, here are 5 polyamory myths to check yourself. How much exactly, you know about polyamory?
Starting slow. Let’s get the word meaning first. Polyamory comes from the Greek language, meaning many love ones. Not to be mistaken with an open relationship. In reality, it’s a non-monogamous relationship, unique in that it’s conspired by multiple loving partners.
Actually, it’s believed that polyamory is like a sensual orientation. This means that you can be in a monogamous relationship and still be polyamory. Of course, your partners should know about each other’s existence and be okay with the shit. The thing is, that a lesbian doesn’t begin to be less of a lesbian when she doesn’t have a partner. At the end of the day, it’s more about self-identification.
Well…nope. This is more about swingers. Polyamory is about acknowledging the fact that a human being can have feelings simultaneously for more than one partner, Moreover, these feelings are not always expressed in specific actions of a sexual nature. It’s not all about sex like it is with swinging. Polyamory is about relationships. And relations are different, including platonic ones.
Polyamory is also called “ethical non-monogamy”, and in this phrase, the keyword is “ethical”. If you have two partners who DO NOT know about each other’s existence, then this is “unethical monogamy”. And in simple terms, you cheat on them with each other.
There are no musts in polyamory. It’s not some kind of a fucking team sport. There are many couples where one of the partners is polyamore (that is, accepts and maintains several parallel relationships), and the second does not feel such a need, does not believe that he has an emotional resource for maintaining several relationships, a sufficient amount of time, energy and so on. The only question is whether this moment has been spoken, whether you were able to agree on a format of relations that suits you both, or does the first person “polyamorize” secretly (then, I repeat, this is not polyamory, but treason). We all have different needs for a love relationship. This, if you think about it, is generally one of the most important postulates of a polyamic ideology, from which everyone else flows.
Of course, they are jealous. They just try to live this state a little differently – they don’t accumulate poison in themselves, don’t suppress the feelings that have arisen, but try to figure out at the moment what is happening and why the situation caused such feelings. This is one of the basic conditions of existence in a polyamorous union: to do everything possible to be in harmony with your own feelings, so that they, accidentally don’t bring pain to a partner or to the partners.
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